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Thursday, 6 September 2012

Calm your titties!!

So I've had all these randoms coming up to me & just f*cken yelling at me cause its beena while since I blogged anything.

But all you psycho b*tches need to understand that I've got a life and (believe it or not) I've got friends and people who wanna associate with me, so can we all agree to calm our eyelashes??!

Anyway my time is limited (with school & my lovey @MalcomXJHB -feel free to follow him so, I'm letting you all know, I will be a sporadic blogger. Pleas keep all your angry-ass tweets & relax


"Normality is only a nightmare for the insane"

Thursday, 3 May 2012

The "Psycho" Games.... [Brilliant movie]

Hey b*tches!

The crazy has returned to rant bout all that is wrong in the world & (OMG) what a weird long-weekend.

I went on a date with the craziest dude EVER, (& not a good kinda crazy), the "B*tch-you-needa-stopping-skipping-your-meds-cause-i-fear-for-society-and-the-people-that-surround-you" kinda crazy! He was absolutely PSYCHO!! 

I know that girls love a man who cares bout them & calls them on the regular.... But last time i checked, calling 3 times every hour is not caring. Dass some straight up stalker sh*t!! & the worst part he got hella pissed when i didn't answer. Like, if i talked to you LITERALLY 5 minutes ago, the f*ck you calling again for?! & if i didn't answer your 3rd call..... wtf makes you think that ima answer tha 22nd one (No jokes-he called me 22 times in the space of 10 minutes)

He eventually walked out on me [twice] in the middle of THE HUNGER GAMES!! {awesome movie} all because i called him up on his psychotic behaviour..... [but dass another story].

Why can't guys just be normal? They either stalk you till you just wanna blow yourself up..... OR.... they simple just don't give two sh*ts bout you!!

I'm not stereotyping all men......  F*ck it! I actually am cause i've yet to meet a normal guy... (& i don't wanna hear none of this "The normals are stuck in the friendzone" crap)

A newspaper is a device for making the ignorant more ignorant and the crazy crazier.

Wednesday, 25 April 2012

Road to Munich!

After many many days & month & decades of listening to people belittle Chelsea (especially Manchester united fans), i've f*cken had enough!

Being the True Blue lady that i am, it really grinds me the wrong way, (no, that is not an innuendo), when people keep complaining bout how much we suck. Sure we're not always in top form but we're a top flight team.

And yes, our squad may have a few aging players but those so-called "Oldies" have done what Arsenal, Man. City & even Mansh*tster have failed to do.... They have defeated the greatest team im the world!

Now i got double standard cause i actually love Baca but, everybody (even if yu dunno me) knows that Cfc is my life! There was never any doubt last night as to where my loyalties lie. So sad for Uefalona (Lol, pun on 'Barcelona' & "uefa") their trip to Munich has takin a trip through a field, into a forest & deep into a mud pool. 

Even if we get crushed by Madrid in Munich, we've gotten further than anyone coulda ever predicted so i proudly say "BLUE RUNS THROUGH MY BLOOD"!!


Monday, 23 April 2012

Johannesburg issue?

So internet's been a little b*tch, but i'm back now!! The ranting shall continue.... 

Its hella cold today but its not snowing or nothing, it rained a bit but that stopped ages ago. 
I just seen some dumb b*tch in knee-high boots,jeans, thick coat, beanie, scarf & gloves.....Drinking out of a thermal mug, I'm guessing its coffee or another hot beverage - judging by the amount of steam). I'm sorry, but when did we move to the middle of the Artic?

Thats the thing about Joburgers,we see a bit of sunshine we think we're on jersey Shore. We see a bit of rain we're instantly transported to the middle of the Artic.

I guess every city has its own issues. The Johannesburg issue is: People don't know how to f*cken dress!!

 I was crazy back when being crazy really meant something



Wednesday, 18 April 2012

Look at me.... I'm a f*cken escort!!

Oh how i loathe attention seekers!!

This is not a hater blog, i am not a hater.
But  people  that spend hours everyday constructing themselves in such a way that they get oodles of attention & then they wanna cry foul when they get said attention, [because they're walking round the mall in a bikini top & a tube top-worn as a skirt],  that really pisses me off. I'm sorry, i thought this was Johannesburg not Jersey Shore. 

So unless you plan on spending the next 6 hours driving to the nearest beach.... You really have no business showing us your 'business' in the mall & then getting all butthurt when you attract the wrong kind of attention. 

You live in JOHANNESBURG!! You are in the middle of the continent, not on the beach front. 
Cover up your hanging titties, put on some decent clothes, fix your drag queen make-up & i PROMISE people will stop thinking you are an escort! 

 Did that offend you?

Idgaf!! Cause it's the truth

Don't let people drive you crazy when you know it's in walking distance

Tuesday, 17 April 2012

The closet is full: 2.0

Before everyone starts f*cken yelling at me about all the "Good guys being in the friendzone". There is a reason why they are keeping the bench warm.... It didn't happen by accident.

The closet is full

Even thought i've often been told that i've got the mindset & mentality of a guy.... I still don't understand men. Maybe its cause some of yal are dumb..... BUT.... I don't judge.

Why is it that guys have such an alarming lack of common sense? 

Why do guys go out of their way, make damn fools of themselves to get a (beautiful) girls attention, once they have her attention they cheat on her with some man-looking-testostrone-filled whore she-male..... I just don't get it.

Some guys just need to come outta the closet cause we can already see your toes sticking out. 

& i know its not all guys.... But i've yet to meet a guy thats NOT an undercover whore/asshole

 ✩Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must live